


The One Thing We Leave Behind

by raethye



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Hopeful Ending, Ladyhawke Quote, Not A Fix-It, Not That Hopeful, POV Jyn Erso, Rebelcaptain - Freeform, Tragic Romance, song inspiration
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-06
Updated: 2017-04-06
Packaged: 2018-10-15 07:29:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10552452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/raethye/pseuds/raethye
Summary: I accept each treasured second to commit him to memory. Even if my memory never leaves this planet, I will carry him—his smile, his voice, his faith in me—in the echo of my soul.*A RebelCaptain one-shot.





	

High above the beaches of Scarif, I have a picturesque view of the carnage. Bodies fall to the sand. Ships drop from the sky.

It’s almost beautiful.

_Thank you, my friends._

In such a short time, we rallied—me, Cassian, Bodhi, Chirrut, Baze, Kaytu—five strangers and one magnificent bastard of a droid. What an odd sort of family we made. Not one I might have chosen if given the option, but one I am grateful to have found. One that led me here, to the gates of darkness, and through.

Mama was right to trust in the Force.

_I wouldn’t have made it without you,_ I whisper to the sky.

_Who are you?_ Orson Krennic stares me down, body rigid with anger and denial.

_I am Jyn Erso. Daughter of Galen and Lyra._ Rebel. Fighter. Harbinger of my father’s revenge. _He put a fuse in the middle of your machine, and I’ve just told the entire galaxy how to light it._

I hope.

I am a champion of hope, after all.

But there is still the shield. Surrounding this planet. Blocking my transmission to the rebel fleet above.

I’m out of time. I know this, even as the man before me gloats.

_I lose nothing but time. You—on the other hand—die, with the Rebellion._

Orson Krennic levels his blaster at me. _My father called you friend once_ , I think, searching for some scrap of humanity that might have convinced Galen Erso that _this_ toady of darkness had any moral compass guiding him.

He’s going to shoot me, and part of me is reconciled to this. I’ve done all I could, all anyone could ask for against such improbable odds.

I flinch when the expected blaster shot comes, but I’m not the one to fall. Krennic drops to the platform in my stead, motionless. My gaze finds the source of the shot, finds _him_. Cassian Andor.

He’s alive. He’s _alive?_

My heart and soul shout in triumphant silence.

Outwardly, I don’t stop the small, fierce smile my lips form.

Overhead, a star destroyer loses the fight. First against the Rebellion. Then against gravity. It dives, almost gracefully, nose first. The planetary shield flickers and dies as the great ship tears through the generator station.

This is it.

I stumble to the transmission relay and yank the manual upload lever down.

_Transmitting…_

_Transmitting…_

Cassian’s laugh is little more than a staccato breath. At once surprise, joy, and doubt. I stagger over to him, my smile fading. Ever the soldier, he maintains his focus on Krennic. I clench my jaw, ready to kick the kriffer over the side of the platform.

_Hey—_ A hard hand catches my arm. _Leave it._

He yanks me back—

_Leave it._

Not letting me go even when I stop fighting—

_That’s it._

Not even when my body is tight against his.

_That’s it._

Each of his labored breaths warms my face, ruffles my hair.

_Let’s go._

I want to finish Krennic. I want to stay exactly _here_ , with Cassian, but—I see an unwanted truth writ in the pained lines of his face, the dark circles beneath his eyes. He is alive, but not for long. I wasn’t wrong to be shocked he survived the fall at all.

I stop denying that I’ll follow this man to the ends of the galaxy and slide his arm across my shoulders, bracing him for the walk to the lift.

_You think—anybody’s listening?_

_I do,_ I tell him. _Someone’s out there._

In my heart, I know the Force didn’t guide us this far to fail.

Cassian’s grunt of pain as we reach the lift, though—

The Force didn’t guide us this far to _live_ , either, it seems.

The doors close. We descend in alternating bands of light and darkness. I live for each glimpse of his face, not quite knowing when my arm finds its way over his shoulder, my fingertips almost reaching the unruly edges of his hair.

In the darkness, his lips brush mine—or do I only imagine that part? In the light, his eyes are once more locked on mine, as determined as me to remember this. All of it.

No matter how much it hurts, I would do it all again.

For the hope we bring.

For these fractured moments of discovery. Wonder. Trust.

I accept each treasured second to commit him to memory. Even if my memory never leaves this planet, I will carry him—his smile, his voice, his faith in me—in the echo of my soul.

The lift doors open over a trail of bodies, so many belonging to our tiny army. I can only pray the sacrifices made here absolved them of any guilt they carried in their hearts.

_It was worth it._ Cassian presses his cheek to my temple. _We did it._

I nod against him, my disheveled mop of hair catching on his bristly jaw.

Toward the horizon, a green beam boils the sea. The ocean breeze gathers strength from the blast. There is no talk of running or hiding.

Maybe we knew the end of our story all along.

I help him to the water’s edge where we collapse, and stars, it hurts. Everything hurts now, as the adrenaline ebbs. But even this is good. It’s real. It’s ours.

The time for strength is done. These last, precious seconds are for me. Him. _Us_.

_Your father would have been proud of you, Jyn._

The heartfelt words draw a smile from me. I reach for his hand, holding tight to him—my last and best reason for living. We find our way to our knees and into each other’s arms.

Cassian’s hold tightens around me as the end comes, swift and blinding. His fingers clench in my shirt, mine in his sweat damp hair.

_I’ll find you,_ he whispers. _Whatever comes next, Jyn, I_ will _find you._

His words take hold, a spark in my heart, and I clutch him closer.

I never did much right in life. But in these last moments—a man I know I might have loved in my arms—well, maybe this is all the _right_ anyone can hope for.

And there it is, one last time. The one thing we worked so hard for. The one thing we leave behind.

Hope.

I press my lips to his ear.

_Not if I find you first._

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by this song right here...
> 
> [How Did You Love](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GA1Sm3tvS0c)


End file.
